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Why Your Authentic Self is the Only One That Matters

Why Your Authentic Self is the Only One That Matters

Bobby Maximus on not giving a damn, the gritty reality of family vacations, the Judd Lienhardt Podcast and more...

Greg Scheinman
March 02, 2025

Morning, Greg here! Welcome to Midlife Male, the lifestyle magazine for midlife men, by midlife men. I want to personally welcome all our new readers to this issue.

Today’s Midlife Male includes:

‘HOW BOBBY MAXIMUS SEES IT’ - Why Your Authentic Self is the Only One That Matters
→ On not giving a damn, bringing your kids everywhere, Simone Biles & why small groups of friends rule
VIEWPOINT: The Glory of Rome (and the Gritty Reality of Family Vacations)
→ Maximizing bucket list trips, sharing what’s not on Instagram, what dads worry about, needing time to ourselves and taking stock
The 6Fs (Family, Fitness, Finance, Fashion, Food, Fun)
→The Judd Lienhardt Podcast, Bryan Johnson vs. The New York Times, Your Old Baseball Card Collection, the Porsche of Clippers & more…

In partnership with:

Bobby Maximus is one of those guys that I wouldn’t have considered approaching in my younger days. I’d have been too intimidated, to be honest. MMA fighter. Jacked to the moon. Jiu Jitsu champion. Alpha. Obsessive about his training, workouts, discipline, and recovery.

Is he always right? No. And I don't agree with everything he says. But that's what makes it even cooler.

We've had numerous conversations—on the record, off the record, on my podcast—about supplementation, training intensity, recovery days, how to train effectively, what guys are missing in terms of consistency and accountability, and how to do all of this while being married with children and running a business.

And nobody performs like this guy. It's unbelievable. If you want to know how somebody really walks their talk, Bobby's one of those guys. Because he puts in the work. I will tell you he's exactly what he appears to be. And because of that, he’s helped me become a better man.

Enjoy this week's "How I See It" with Bobby Maximus.

HOW BOBBY MAXIMUS SEES IT

MLM: Bobby, you’re the “Keeper of Authenticity” according to your Instagram tagline. What does authenticity mean to you?

Bobby Maximus: It’s about being true to yourself, plain and simple. I see so many people flip-flopping—saying one thing today, something else tomorrow, and it doesn’t add up. Take politics: if you’re pro-choice because you believe in bodily autonomy, but then push mandatory vaccines, that’s inconsistent. Same goes for the other side—anti-abortion but anti-vaccine mandates? Pick a lane. I respect anyone’s opinion if it’s consistent. Authenticity is living your truth without the cognitive dissonance.

MLM: How do you stay authentic and hold others accountable to it?

Bobby Maximus: I call people out when their actions don’t match their words—not to troll, but to keep it real. If a friend posts something hypocritical, I’ll shoot them a private message like, “Hey, this doesn’t line up—maybe rethink it.” In coaching, it’s the same deal. You’re not losing weight while chugging soda every day—I’m not here to coddle you, I’m here to tell you the truth. That’s how I stay authentic and push others to look at themselves.

MLM: You’re great at calling out bullshit—like with the Simone Biles situation in the Olympics a few years back. What stood out to you there?

Bobby Maximus: Yeah, that pissed me off. People shredded her for “quitting” the Olympics, but a month earlier, those same folks were all over Mental Health Month, preaching self-care. You don’t get to cherry-pick when mental health matters. If you’re about it, be about it all the time. The internet’s full of that double-talk, and I’m just tired of the hypocrisy.

MLM: As a coach, what are the most common excuses you hear from guys—especially men juggling family, work, and fitness?

Bobby Maximus: It all boils down to one thing: you’re responsible for your success or failure. The excuses—time, kids, no equipment—are just people dodging that truth. They’re either too lazy, don’t want it bad enough, or don’t value it. I’ve got kids running around, a wife working long shifts, and I still get my workouts in because I value it. If it matters to you—like my Men’s Health gigs or Joe Rogan’s podcasts—you make it happen. Value drives action.

MLM: Speaking of value, how do you balance your values—like being a dad—with what you get out of your work?

Bobby Maximus: Values are your moral compass—being a good husband, dad, whatever. Value, though, is what you get out of something, whether it’s money, fun, or purpose. I pour energy into what I value, like training or family, because it pays off for me—literally and figuratively. If I didn’t value it, I wouldn’t bother. It’s that simple.

MLM: You’ve got this unapologetic charisma—where did that come from? Was it always there, or did it grow over time?

Bobby Maximus: I think I just got older and stopped giving a damn. In your 20s, you’re obsessed with what people think. Now? If you don’t like me, that’s your problem, not mine. I’m not here to impress anyone—I’m just me. That shift came with age and self-confidence. I’m a bit of a grumpy old man now, and I lean into it.

MLM: Where’d all that “care” go once you stopped worrying about others’ opinions?

Bobby Maximus: It went into what matters—my family, my close friends, my work. I don’t waste energy on noise anymore. Back in the day, a negative comment would wreck me. Now? I don’t even blink. It’s about focusing on what’s real and letting the rest slide.

MLM: Big circle or small circle—how do you roll socially?

Bobby Maximus: Small circle, hands down. I’d rather invest in two or three legit friends than have 30 fake ones. “Friend” gets thrown around too loosely these days. Have we shared a meal? Helped each other through tough shit? That’s a friend. Instagram buddies or acquaintances? Fine, but my real circle’s tight. I don’t have time for surface-level nonsense.

MLM: Your day’s packed—podcasts, Instagram, training, kids. What does a typical Bobby Maximus day look like?

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Maximizing Bucket List Family Trips (and the stuff you don’t see on Instagram)

By Greg Scheinman

I hadn't been to Italy in 30 years since I had studied abroad in Florence myself during the 2nd semester of my junior year. I was so excited to go back this time, at 52, with my wife, our younger son, Harper, and to visit our 21-year-old son, Auden, who is having his own study abroad experience there during his junior year of college. These are the experiences that I value most in life. I talk a lot about experiences over things, and here was that opportunity.

There's a statistic that's gained a lot of traction lately about how once your children are past the age of 18, you will have spent something like 80% of the time you're ever going to spend with them.

That has hit me hard for a long time now, especially because I know how valuable time is, having lost my own father when I was just 17. So we've made it a point in our family that our standard is to be on the other side of that statistic. We're going to spend at least 2 months out of the year together, the 4 of us. It might be 1 or 2 days here. It might be 10 days in Italy. It might be a summer rental. It might be Kate and I moving and renting a place closer to where the boys are living. We're going to do everything in our power to hold that standard.

And here was an opportunity for 10 days together, the 4 of us, that we were going to make the most of.

And it was glorious.

If you follow me on Instagram, you saw all of the pictures from all of the sights - probably too many, with me throwing up all over social media daily. But here’s what I really feel and genuinely believe to be true: That my wife is stunning, and crushing it at 55. That I'm blessed with 2 incredible sons. That they have different personalities and skill sets and styles that bring life and joy to our lives and complement one another. That they're both young men of character and have a unique closeness and bond.

I’m proud of that. And I hope every father feels the way I do when they look at their kids.

Kate found an incredible apartment in Rome. We ate our way through that city with enough pizza, pasta, lasagna, and tiramisu to deplete the country's reserves. We walked and walked and shopped and toured and laughed and loved and hugged and exhausted ourselves so that we went to bed exhausted - the good kind - and woke up with energy every day.

I loved the Colosseum. I cried in the Jewish ghetto of Rome. The afternoon that Harper and I walked down the Spanish steps and into the hottest shopping area I have ever been in, boutique after boutique. The random gelatos, and there were a lot of random gelatos. The train to Florence, our apartment in Florence that Cameron Herold recommended, which was stellar. The jokes about David at the David. Finally finding protein and bistecca Fiorentina so I could gorge myself with something other than more pizza, lasagna, and pasta. The train to Bologna. The canals. The views. It was special.

And it was us.

And with all of the awesome stuff, there's also always something you're not seeing. There's always more that's under the hood. And that's the reality of family, and that's the reality of life; and midlife, you get it all.

The other side of the coin…

LISTEN: The Judd Lienhard Podcast with Greg Scheinman

This week Greg appeared on the Judd Lienhard Podcast. Judd is an elite functional strength coach in Austin, Texas and Greg recently traveled to Judd’s gym/homebase to chop it up about fitness, fatherhood, midlife and more. Give it a listen here.

Bryan Johnson Goes Toe-to-Toe with the New York Times

While we’ve certainly had our disagreements with Mr. “Don’t Die” Bryan Johnson on his longevity, health and fitness protocols, his recent posts on standing up for himself against a planned hit piece from the Times is fascinating stuff. Imagine if you were in his shoes.

Guest Post:

My Lunch With a Bitcoin Believer

by Ron Speaker

On a recent trip to Canada, I found myself seated next to a Crypto Maxi during lunch—one of those all-in, ride-or-die believers in the future of digital currency. I didn’t expect the conversation, but I enjoyed it. People like this don’t just open the door to their world easily, but if you stay curious, life presents learning opportunities. And if there’s one thing a good investor needs, it’s a healthy dose of greedy curiosity. The world moves fast, and the ability to think beyond the obvious is how you find the next great idea.

This particular lunch happened two days after Argentina’s President, Javier Milei, tried to pull a Trump-style move by backing a new meme coin called $LIBRA (because, you know, libertarian branding). Hours later, he yanked his support, sending the coin into an 89% freefall after an initial surge. Given how the Trump meme coin performed a month earlier, plenty of speculators—including my lunch companion—piled in, hoping for a quick win. Instead, they got rugged, just like those who gambled on other meme coins like Melania, Caitlyn Jenner, or even the 15-minute-famous Hawk Tuah girl.

The Midlife Fit Club Visual Meal Plan

If the very idea of a “meal plan” makes you cringe, we hear you. These plans are usually filled with difficult recipes, bland food and macros that don’t work for active guys. This plan, however, from Jeff Sutherland, is different. Full visuals of every meal. High protein. High quality. High flavor. Jeff is shredded at 52-years-old and if it works for him, it’s worth trying.

Introducing the Porsche of Hair Clippers

Guys always ask Greg about what clippers he recommends and the answer is consistent: the BaByless Pro Gold FX Trimmer. Clean. Impeccable razor. Cuts like the blades were just sharpened every time.

Remember When You Thought Your Baseball Card Collection Was Worth Millions?

Our EIC Jon Finkel takes us on a nostalgic trip down Don Mattingly memory lane with this post on what it was like to collect cards back in the 80s & 90s. It’s been a two-day conversation in the comments, with guys reminiscing about Eric Davis, Jose Canseco and the Kirby Puckett rookie card they dreamed about. Enjoy the piece here.

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Join the Inner Circle

The MLM Inner Circle is a community for midlife men, by midlife men. Our members are accomplished men over 40 looking to level-up across every area of their lives.

Some have been married for decades, others are divorced, most are fathers. All of our members seek improvement, access, insights, and support in a group of like-minded men. They are committed to making the next phase of their lives, the best phase of their lives, living happier, healthier, wealthier, stronger and having more fun in business and in life.

We do rolling admission — join today.