Optimization Gone Bad

Morning. Greg here! In this week’s issue I give a full breakdown about why just about every so-called longevity protocol and optimization technique is potentially useful but mostly unnecessary. Jon takes us inside the end of a personal 30-year losing streak with a great story about fathers, sons, golf and why you need to lose more to build resilience. And our 6Fs are loaded! I’m sharing the new hip routine that’s fixing my mobility, my 10 steps to eating well on the road, the Five-Pocket Terry Stretch pants that I love and more…

Also, as you’re reading this, we’re wrapping up our incredible Palm Beach Excellent Adventure. Twenty guys. Paddle boarding. Snorkeling. Eating incredible food. Hanging out at a cutting-edge wellness center. Living our motto: do cool sh*t with cool guys. If you’re interested in joining us at a future Adventure, check it out here.

How I See It by Greg Scheinman

I am more convinced than ever that to live happier, healthier, wealthier, stronger, and have more fun, we need to cut out all this ridiculousness around optimization and biohacking.

Health and wellness, as they’re being sold, mean shoving lasers up your nose to activate your brain. Covering all four walls of your bedroom in red light. Walking on a treadmill at your desk while you’re already on the business treadmill daily. Wearing a Whoop, an Oura, and a continuous glucose monitor at the same time. Getting blood work done constantly. Counting every step, measuring every moment of sleep, fixating on your heart rate variability, then deciding whether you’re energetic or tired because some device tells you you’re in the red, yellow, or green. That’s not rhythm. That’s ridiculous.

Meanwhile, “thought leaders” who don’t seem to be enjoying anything are telling you to cut out everything you enjoy. Can’t eat this. Can’t eat that. Can’t shop in this part of the grocery store. One sip of alcohol or the wrong protein bar is going to throw off the next five days of your life.

Sauna. Cold plunge. Wake up before the sun. Meditate, hum, bounce, and journal, all before you’re supposed to lift weights. As soon as you finish lifting, you’d better get enough protein, within your eating window. Better find time to recover, too, which means getting in the sun. Touch grass. Maybe even point your asshole up to the sky. I’m not making this up.

Then there’s the PEMF mat, the $10,000 vibrating chair, the mask over your face, and the different sound waves you apparently need to downregulate. And don’t forget the vagus nerve. We’ve got to make sure we get everything to access the vagus nerve.

It’s exhausting, and it’s way beyond what any normal human being should have to do to be healthy. Especially while being married, raising a family, running a business, earning a living, and trying your damnedest to live a good life…

The Manologue by Jon Finkel

There’s a line in Elton John’s “Measure of a Man,” from the Rocky V soundtrack, that has been on my mind. Yes, this is probably the least-watched Rocky movie including the Creed series. And yes, this is probably one of the least-listened-to movie soundtracks ever, despite a few nice offerings from Rob Base. But I have the CD and I still play it in my garage gym. There’s a stanza that goes like this:

You've come full circle, now you're home, Without the gold, without the chrome, And this is where you've always been, You had to lose so you could win, And rise above your troubles while you can…

At the time, we thought that was going to be the last Rocky movie, so there’s a lot of sentimentality to the lyrics. Obviously, there would be four more. 

But I bring this up because I recently ended a lifelong losing streak, and it reminded me of how often I lose and how often I put myself in a position to lose. Losing all the time builds a level of resilience that makes you just about immune to failure in every aspect of your life. And it makes winning that much sweeter.

This past Saturday, I played golf with my dad and my brother. We’re lucky enough to all live close to each other, and even though my brother and I have five kids between us, and my dad has his own stuff going on, we try to play together at least once a month. Usually twice.

I am, by far, the worst golfer of the three of us. I even wrote a column earlier this year called “It’s Time to Stop Sucking at Golf.” I took a lesson. I practiced a few times. I admit I didn’t put a whole lot of effort into not sucking at golf beyond thinking about that one lesson and continuing to play at my abysmal level.

My dad is 76 now, but for most of his life, he was an exceptional golfer. He had a single-digit handicap for a long time and aside from days when his age catches up to him, still regularly breaks 90 easily. My brother is more coordinated than I am and is simply a better golfer. He regularly shoots in the low 90s, no problem. I almost always shoot around 100, but I can easily shoot a 106 if things break poorly. At best, I shoot a 98 or 99.

In all my years of playing golf with them, going back to high school, I had never beaten either one. Occasionally, I’ll get off to a fast start or shoot a great front nine or a decent back nine. But we all know that no matter how well I start, at some point I’ll lose four balls off the tee in a row, five-putt, or hit three balls into the water. Then I’ll be on my way to a wonderful score of 100 or 102 or 107.

This Saturday, that blow-up never happened. I shot a 46 on the front and a 47 on the back for my career-low score of 93. My brother and I were tied on the green on the last hole, and I sank my putt to beat him, 93–94. My dad had an incredible front nine but tired out and scratched a few holes at the end. Like I said, this would be no contest if he were in his prime. He’d probably shoot an 84 or an 82 or a 78.

All of this is to say that I finally won at something I’ve been competing in for three decades. That’s a lot of losing and it made the win feel great, but it also made me realize that I lose constantly. It’s a daily occurrence in my life…

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In 1960 Carl Jung gave an interview entitled “The Art of Living”. These are remarkably  simple ideas about family, health, relationships, meaningful work and the ability to deal with setbacks.  Nothing complicated. “Knowing what's important, is what’s most important”.  It’s rule #1 in The Midlife Male Operating System, but knowing what matters and designing our lives around those things are two very different things… And that’s where the work lives. Here are the “5 Things” Jung talked about. Make them a part of your family value system: 

No shocker here that as we age our joints and muscle get tighter, no place more so than in our hips. I’ve been incorporating these movements several times a week and with consistency and intention I am seeing some real progress. Having issues with your hips? Try some of these exercises. Even a few every day can make a big difference:

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You’ve been told to save for the future. What if the future steals your life?  Die With Zero is a NY Times bestseller written by former Hedge Fund manager Bill Perkins. Its lessons may change your perspective on money, work/life balance, travel, adventure, and time. It did for me.  A couple of the core concepts are “time bucketing” and “memory dividends” and how the utility of money peaks around 40.  “Retirement is just when you stop sacrificing today for an imaginary tomorrow.”  That line landed with me. There are experiences that belong in your 20s. Others your 30s. Some in your 40s and some that may be physically impossible by your 70s…

I just got off the road. It’s harder to eat well when traveling but I have my standards and do my best to stay as close to them as possible wherever I am.  I ate at The Ruxton, both nights in Baltimore. Night one: 6oz Filet, Broccoli, Baked Potato. Night two: Grilled Salmon, asparagus, rice. Drank a couple of Heineken 0.0’s.  Place was great. Here's how I eat and how I coach my clients to eat.

1. Build every plate around protein.

Fish, chicken, eggs, beef, Greek yogurt, beans. After 40 we lose muscle every year unless we fight for it, and protein is the ammunition. If you only remember one rule, remember this one.

2. Fill the rest with plants.

Vegetables first, fruit second. Every menu on earth has a salad, a side of greens, or something grilled. 

3. Eat real food most of the time.

Pick things with one ingredient, or a short list you can pronounce. This works in any country, in any language.

4. Drink water like it's your job.

Start the day with a big glass before coffee. Order water with every meal, especially on planes and at altitude. 

5. Watch the liquid calories.

Cocktails, sodas, fancy coffees, and juice add up fast and don't fill you up. Enjoy a great glass of wine or a cold beer, but choose it on purpose instead of drinking on autopilot.

6. Stop at satisfied, not stuffed.

Eat slowly. Put the fork down. Leave a few bites. Restaurant portions are built for profit, not for your health.

7. Close the kitchen early.

Give yourself a few hours between your last meal and bed. You'll sleep better, wake up lighter, and feel sharper in the morning.

8. Plan for the chaos.

Travel, meetings, kids, airports. Keep a backup ready: nuts, jerky, a protein bar, a piece of fruit. Most bad food decisions happen when we're starving and unprepared.

9. Follow the 80/20 rule.

Eat clean 80% of the time and enjoy life the other 20%. The pasta in Italy, the birthday cake, the BBQ with your buddies: that's living, and it isn't failure. Consistency beats perfection every time.

10. Make food part of the adventure.

Food is fuel, but it's also culture, connection, and joy. Sit down, share the table, and taste where you are.

The bottom line: Protein first, plants second, water always, and booze and sugar on purpose. Eat like the man you're becoming.

Faherty started out as the beach-shirt brand. It was all surf-town flannels and sun-faded prints. Over the past few years it has grown into something more interesting: a go-to for elevated staples. The quality is there, with soft fabrics and thoughtful details that hold up wash after wash. The value is there too, since you're paying for well-made clothes, not a logo. And there are plenty of options, so you can build out a whole fall wardrobe without leaving the site. These are clothes that look sharp at dinner, feel good on a plane, and don't make you look like you're trying too hard. Their new fall collection is especially strong.

My fall picks:

I think this question should be the icebreaker for all meetings, dinners, conferences and any time you get introduced to someone. It’s a lot more “fun” than “what do you do?” when everyone knows you’re talking about work and what you do for a living. Try it next time! You’ll stop people in their tracks. 

Here’s how I'd answer it right now:  “Just got back from Sun Valley where I climbed the equivalent of Everest in 36hrs with a group of awesome guys.  Paddleboarded around Peanut Island off Palm Beach with our adventure club.  Doing this cool event in NYC called the SuperAge Games where a few hundred of us are gonna test the 8 metrics that predict our health and longevity.  Met my son in Colorado and hiked a couple of 14’ers…”  I’m not suggesting that everything I do for fun is what you should be doing, I am saying that the more fun you’re having, the more interesting you are and the more interesting you are, the more people tend to want to be around you, do business with you and get inspired by you. And that’s a fun feeling.  

Midlife Male Founder: Greg Scheinman / Follow Greg on Instagram & LinkedIn

Love Greg’s How I See It column? Visit the full How I See It Archive HERE where he shares his personal insights, experiences and perspectives on everything affecting midlife.

Buy My Book Here / Schedule 1-1 Coaching / Speaking Inquires Here

Midlife Male Editor-in-Chief: Jon Finkel / Follow Jon on Twitter/X and Instagram

Love Jon’s Manologue column? Check out the full Manologue Archive HERE. And if you really enjoy Jon’s writing, pre-order his upcoming thriller, Bear Brawl, now. USA Today Bestselling author Stayton Bonner calls it “Jack Reacher Meets The Edge.”