Good morning. Greg, here! Welcome to Midlife Male, the fastest-growing, #1 newsletter and lifestyle brand for men 40+. In today’s issue I share my thoughts after 23-hours on the road alone, Jon’s had enough of the Internet making up dumb terms for midlife men and our 6Fs includes a schedule of yearly trips you should plan, the perfect “go anywhere” outfit and more… 

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How I See It by Greg Scheinman

One of the biggest lies midlife guys tell themselves is that they don’t have time to think. Not for an hour. Not for a day. Definitely not for a 23-hour drive across the country. But most of us don’t actually have a time problem. We have a noise problem. Every open space gets filled immediately. Phone calls. Podcasts. Emails. Group texts. Scrolling. Consuming. Reacting. We move from one obligation to the next without ever sitting still long enough to ask ourselves a simple question: 

Do I even like the direction I’m heading?

I realized that somewhere on I-10 West, driving alone from Houston to Los Angeles to bring my son Harper a car for the summer.

Harper just finished his freshman year at Loyola Marymount and has officially become a California kid and I love it for him. He got a summer job out there and wanted to stay in LA, which meant he needed a car. Because of California registration and insurance laws for a 19-year-old, it made more sense to buy the car in Texas, put him on my insurance, and drive it out myself. So that’s what I’m doing.

And somewhere between Phoenix and the Pacific, I realized this drive was giving me something I hadn’t had in a long time: space. Not productivity. Not content. Not optimization. Just good old fashioned empty time and space. No meetings. No coaching calls. No bouncing between projects. No rushing through another airport. Just me, the road, and enough quiet to actually hear my own thoughts again.

I think midlife men underestimate how badly we need that. Not necessarily a vacation or a retreat or even “alone time”. Just moments where we stop filling every available inch of our lives with noise. Stillness doesn’t happen by default or by accident. You have to choose it. It’s an intentional decision.

I forgot to get gas the night before I left, so I pulled out of a station around 4:51AM near my house and there’s something different about being on the road that early. The people out there at that hour aren’t wandering around killing time. They’re headed somewhere. There’s purpose in the air before sunrise.…

Read the full How I See It about how reflection can bring direction HERE:

The Manologue by Jon Finkel

No guy ever slid into a golf cart next to one of his pals after ripping a driver, cracked a Michelob Ultra, lit a cigar and said, “dude, time to celebrate bro culture.”

Because despite the constant use of the phrase “bro culture” online and all its stupid offshoots like “tech bro” and “gym bro” and the media throwing “bro” onto everything guys like to try and rip into guys hanging out, there’s no such thing. 

Bro culture doesn’t exist.

It’s a made up term by, I’m guessing, “non bros” to put down anything groups of guys like to do together. It’s not something a single normal man on this planet has ever thought or said. It’s not a culture at all. There’s nothing defining or “different” about it. 

Guys like to hang out doing different things. Especially midlife guys. That’s normal stuff. It’s not a separate “culture”. It’s just guys being dudes.

I’ve never stepped onto a court to play pick-up ball and said, “let’s get a good run in, hoop bros.” Or walked into a gym to lift and thought, “Ahh, my fellow gym bros are here.” Nobody thinks or says these things. Unless it’s someone trying to put down those things.

For some reason, the idea of regular guys doing cool stuff with other regular guys bothers some people so they have to come up with goofy labels for stuff from the outside to make it seem weird or “different”. 

If you look up the definition of “bro culture” you will get lots of think pieces using fancy words that all do the same thing: put down guys who have common interests and like to do them together: lift, golf, run, code, surf, train MMA, ride motorcycles, whatever. If guys like to do things with their friends, it’s now a “culture”. It’s not just, you know, friends hanging out.

Now, I admit, I’m behind on lots of this stuff. I use social media for sports, comedy, movies, swimming tips and to promote our articles and my books. I’ve got a pretty tight crew that I follow, so some of the “always online” trends get to me a little late.

Usually, Greg introduces the newest phrase to me casually because he’s heard it in “the online discourse” a bunch, which brings me to the latest made-up word to describe a made-up thing: manosphere.

Until Friday I’d never heard of this word. Then Greg forwarded me an Instagram post by a guy who was railing against it and after I read it, I thought, “what the hell is a manosphere?”

Manosphere sounds like it should be an awesome combat competition on American Gladitiators. Or maybe a 90s Paulie Shore movie…

Do you even know? Do you even care? Most midlife guys don’t. But I have a theory, and it involves one of my favorite scenes from Office Space, so read on and enjoy:

Here’s something nobody tells you until you’re already dealing with it: when your college kid needs a car, buy or lease it in your home state, not the state where they go to school.

My son is in California, but we bought and registered the car in Texas. Better taxes, lower fees, cleaner insurance setup. He stays on my policy as an additional driver, which keeps costs dramatically lower than starting fresh in another state with another insurer.

One call to your insurance agent before signing paperwork can save you thousands. I’m still learning this stuff myself, but whenever I find something useful, I’ll pass it along.

I’m spending a month in LA for one reason: my son is here.

That’s not random. It’s part of my Midlife Action Plan. One of my standards is being where my boys are during important seasons of their lives, so when Harper landed a summer internship out here, Kate and I rented a place and made it happen.

He goes to work. I work from the Airbnb. We hike, grab meals, train, hang out, and spend real time together. That’s the stuff I’ll actually remember.

A lot of guys say family comes first. Very few build their calendar around it.

Most guys overcomplicate fitness while traveling. You really don’t need much.

I bring resistance bands, Altra shoes for workouts and hikes, and an Aion weight vest. At the Airbnb, I’ll pull up a Jules Horn mobility session or a yoga/bodyweight workout on YouTube and get after it for 30-60 minutes.

I’ll also drop into Barry’s, Orangetheory, Solidcore, or a local studio whenever I can. The key is removing decision fatigue. Just show up and move.

Your standards shouldn’t disappear because you changed zip codes.

For the 22-hour drive from Houston to LA, I kept things simple.

I packed 1st Phorm Formula One protein, protein bars, fruit, hard-boiled eggs, turkey, beef jerky, trail mix, oats, and a Yeti cooler full of easy options that kept me from eating garbage at every gas station.

The second I got to LA, I hit Erewhon and Gjusta to stock the house. We also ordered a RORRA countertop water filter for the rental so we’re not living on bottled water and bad tap water all month.

Good nutrition gets a lot easier when you prepare before you’re starving.

There’s basically one outfit I can wear anywhere in LA and feel completely put together.

Levi’s 511s or RRL denim. A black James Perse or Buck Mason t-shirt. PF Flyers or Stan Smiths. If I need to dress it up, I swap in Common Projects Chelsea boots or Red Wings.

Throw on Wayfarers, a solid watch, maybe a Buck Mason cardigan or Alex Mill chore coat if it cools off, and you’re done.

Simple beats complicated every single time.

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This is one of those areas nobody really prepares you for after you turn 45 or so.

You’re still sharp. Still capable. Still getting after it. But somewhere in your 40s and 50s, things start to feel… a step slower. Names don’t come as fast. Focus drifts. Energy dips in the middle of the day. That low-level brain fog creeps in, and you start asking yourself if this is just how it is now.

I don’t accept that.

Just like we train our bodies, I believe we have to support our brains with the right inputs. That’s why I’ve been using 1stPhorm MasterBrain AM. It’s built to support mental focus, clarity, memory, and overall cognitive function so you can actually perform at the level you expect from yourself.

The formula is legit. Ingredients like Acetyl L-Carnitine, Bacopa Monnieri, Lion’s Mane, CDP Choline, and Phosphatidylserine all working together to support brain health and mental energy.

For me, it’s simple. I want to wake up clear. Stay locked in. Think fast. Execute.

Because midlife isn’t the time to slow down. It’s the time to be at your best.

And if your brain isn’t firing the way it should, everything else suffers.

TRY MASTER BRAIN AM HERE

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MLM Founder: Greg Scheinman / Follow Greg on Instagram & LinkedIn

Love Greg’s How I See It column? Visit the full How I See It Archive HERE where he shares his personal insights, experiences and perspectives on everything affecting midlife.

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MLM Editor-in-Chief: Jon Finkel / Follow Jon on Twitter/X and Instagram

Love Jon’s Manologue column? Check out the full Manologue Archive HERE where he writes about pop culture, parenthood, sports, nostalgia & everything in between.