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You’re Not Rich Enough to Quit

Guys love to talk about leaving their job, finding clarity, and following their passion. But nobody’s talking about the reality for most midlife men (especially a lot of the men that I coach): Staying put.

To start, the decision is not as simple as “stay and be miserable” or “quit and be happy”. No way in hell. Most men can’t afford to quit anyway, so take that off the table.

If you’re a high-earner and you’ve done everything “right,” you’ve probably built a life that costs a small fortune to maintain. You’ve got a wife with expensive tastes, kids in private school, a couple of nice cars, a mortgage, a country club, and a social calendar that won’t stop. You’ve got Rolexes, vacations, and a long list of “keeping up with the Joneses” expenses that never end.

And here’s the truth: you probably don’t even know what your passion or purpose really is. And even if you did, chasing it to become a “woodworker” isn’t going to cover two months of your burn rate. It won’t pay tuition, fund exclusive Airbnbs, or buy your wife that new Macan when the Audi lease is up. 

Early retirement for you? Forget it.

So when you see all these guys online preaching about slowing down, finding peace, and living with purpose, remember this: most of them are already rich.

 They sold a company, got bought out, or walked away with a golden parachute. They can afford to “start over.”

You can’t. Not yet. And that’s okay.

I couldn’t either.  For a long time.

Quitting isn’t the move. It would actually make your life even harder. The smarter path is staying. Showing up every single day while you build your way out on your terms. That’s the real work. That’s where most men break. The middle. Between 45 and 55. Life’s given you plenty, but not everything, and nobody wants to hear you complain because you “have it all.”  

This is where I work now. Helping guys “master the middle”.

I take these underwater pool classes every week. The goal is to increase breath capacity: how long you can stay down and still perform. What I’ve learned is that you always have more air than you think. When your brain tells you to come up, you usually have 5 to 30 seconds left. Your body doesn’t need air yet. Your mind is just uncomfortable.

The same thing happens with your career. You think you’re out of air. You think you can’t take it anymore. But you can. You just need to slow down, breathe, and learn to manage the discomfort until you can move with intention.

For me, I had three years of oxygen left. That’s how long it took to make a plan, execute it, and leave the right way. In a perfect world, I would’ve quit the day I burned out. Walked into my partner’s office, told him off, and never looked back. But I don’t live in that world. So I said “good morning” every day for years while I built my way out.

My friend and former Chief of Police, Kristen Ziman, says, “If you’re working under a toxic leader, you have two jobs: survive the system and don’t become it.” There’s a third job. Become the CEO of your life.

That’s what I did. I learned how to play the game and win. Not by knockout, but by going the full twelve rounds and winning by decision. The best decision I ever made.

If you’re in that place—successful on the outside but stuck or stressed on the inside—you’re not alone.

 I’ve been there. I know what it feels like to check every box society told you mattered and still wake up wondering if this is all there is.

Most men don’t need to blow up their lives. You don’t need to torch your career or walk out on your marriage. You need a new plan. One that brings you back to yourself.

That’s where developing your own Midlife Action Plan comes in.

I’ve helped hundreds of men,  guys who look successful but feel miserable, get back what matters most: themselves.

Because all the money, titles, and toys don’t mean much if you’ve lost your health, your purpose, and your joy. What matters is reclaiming your energy, confidence, clarity, time, and connection to the things that actually make life meaningful.

When that happens, everything gets better. You’re happier. You’re healthier. You have more freedom, more peace of mind, and more fun again in your 40s and 50s.

This is what happens when men stop drifting and start designing. When they stop numbing and start living.

That’s what a Midlife Action Plan does. It gives you structure, standards, and accountability to realign your life with what matters most.

I know because I lived it. And now it’s your turn.

If you’re ready to stop drifting and start designing the next and best chapter of your life, let’s build your Midlife Action Plan together.

The Coolest Way to Recover

We’re cold plungers here at MLM. Not every day. Not so extreme that it becomes a battle. I use it as a sustainable tool for recovery, blood flow, lactic acid reduction, and mental clarity. Keep the temp at 50 degrees, stay in 2 minutes, anytime of day, pre or post workout. I recommend PLUNGE.com, the original and the best. Their new ALL-IN model is next level: sleek, app-controlled, whisper quiet, with the chiller built right in. I just got mine a few weeks ago with a personal setup from founder Ryan Duey. Use code MidlifeMale at checkout for an exclusive discount.

In health,

Midlife Male
52. Husband. Father. Entrepreneur. Coach. Student of the game.
Still walking the walk.